Holiday Trivia

Dec. 23rd – First organized holiday merriment and gift exchange.

Dec. 30th – Last organized holiday merriment and gift exchange.

500 – Estimated ml of bourbon consumed between December 23rd and January 1st.

8 – Sets of snaps sewn onto the babies’ Christmas dresses late on Christmas Eve.

1 – Digital instant-read meat thermometer left in the oven by my mother, which was fortunately found in time to save the ham, if not the molten remains of the thermometer. Did y’all know that plastic melts at something below 350 degrees?

0 – Meat forks used to stab annoying family members in the eye.

3 – Family members who were cruising for a meat fork to the eye. Notable infractions included 1) getting up and storming out during the gift exchange when one felt that one’s gifts weren’t of sufficient quality/quantity and 2) telling me that one of the two “big” presents that I gave the girls (a very nice gymini playmat, which is really very cool, and not super-electronic) was “trashy.”

357 – The number of bizarre and completely inappropriate things said by my maternal grandmother. Including a reference to my aunt being “really good with an electric knife.” While eating baked apples, which had nothing to do with an electric knife, and furthermore said aunt delegates the knife work to me whenever possible because she honestly sucks at it. Ai yi yi.

19 – References made from one family member to another to Christmas Vacation. I escaped the fracas on the 25th to go upstairs and nurse, and all I could think of was “I don’t know what to say, except it’s Christmas and we’re all in misery.” I unfortunately didn’t have a cabbage handy to take out my frustrations, but what can you do? Sadly, we have no family members barking for the yak-woman.

4 – Christmas outfits worn by the babies (4 each – 8 total.)

12 – Average number of miles travelled between stops to replace pacifiers on New Years’ trip to Grandma’s house (total distance 180 miles.)

5 – Episodes of the Twilight Zone watched with the parents on New Year’s Eve. Don’t ask about the Clint Eastwood marathon that my Dad found so intriguing.

355 – Days until we have to do it all over again.

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4 Comments on “Holiday Trivia”

  1. Elaine Says:

    LOL! Ahhhh . . . the holidays.

  2. Natasha Says:

    Looking forward to the new year!!!

  3. Jillian Says:

    Ha! I love Clint Eastwood. Hee. 🙂

  4. Christina Says:

    Am catching up on the last 6+ posts… you are so good at blogging, I seem to be having a dry spell these days! Your girls are A-Dor-A-ble!! (in my head that is said with emphasis in a cute kind of way). And I am cracking up at your family Christmas… really, would it be a family Christmas if no one said anything annoying or offensive? LOL.


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