Frustration

10 dpo.  I’m cramping tonight, for no appreciable reason.  Certainly AF isn’t due until sometime next week when I stop the progesterone.  No spotting or anything.

The lines?  I’m reasonably sure they’re evap lines, as I look at them.  It’s amazing the tricks one’s mind can play on one. 

Tonight I’m just tired, and want to know where I stand with this cycle.  I’m feeling pretty down about wasting all this $$ if I get a bfn.  Starbuck’s the only IRL person that knows what’s going on, and she has trouble empathizing with the ttc struggle (she tries – but just doesn’t get it) and I just feel like I need an outlet to vent, so here I am.

I have three First Response tests in the cabinet (5 days before your missed period!  Ooh!  La!!) which I have no idea why I bought, being as I *hated* them with a fiery passion during TTC 1.0.  I have two CBE digitals in there, too, since I’ve heard they’re much more sensitive than they were two years ago.  Never seen a + on either, of course, and I don’t have any intentions of trying out either of them in the next day or two.  I probably won’t use them at all unless I get a decent internet cheapie line, which I figure is never going to happen. 

I’m going to go sit in bed, eat cheese and crackers, drink a fucking Coke and watch Craig Ferguson.  Then I’m going to sleep.  Perhaps my revolting mood will be gone in the a.m. 

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2 Comments on “Frustration”

  1. HP Says:

    Right here with you – though I’m too scare to poas – well the doc says I have to leave it to next Saturday. I’m on 8dpo following IUI with letrozol, puregon (UK name for the FSH stimulating stuff) and Ovitrelle. It’s my first cycle and I’m not hopeful. I’ve been following yours for about 2 weeks – after searching something like “follicle size 13mm” 🙂 Anyway – fingers crossed and good luck.

  2. babybound Says:

    Awww I hope you’re feeling better today. I completely understand the blues but just know that SOME of it is the massive drugs in your body combined with the anxiety that comes free with infertility product. If you need to, eat ice cream or pizza or whatever. Something that comforts you 🙂


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